On promises and tricks

When I first left mah islands to come ta this place the people confused me.  They had so much stuff, more stuff than they could eva carry with dem.  Where I come from you have your weapons an stuff for huntin an fishin an makin shelter, you build a hut in the place you gonna stay for a bit, then you abandon it and move on with the stuff you carry when that stops bein a good spot.  If you leave it behind someone else gonna come pick it up and take it, so no point having more stuff than that.  I met some pirates once who held onta stuff by burying it where no one knew to look, but most folk ova here dun do that either.

When I saw how much Mortma could carry, I thought mayba that was what folk over here did, they all worked hard to get them stupid bags he got and get real strong so they can take all the stuff they got wit them when they move.  But most folk aren't strong as Mort, most of them over here are weak, and even Mortma can't carry a castle, at least not witout it fallin down.

Then we met sum iddits from sum placed name a Aberdeen who said they own the land we live on.  I don't think they ever even been to Mosswood, how they think they hold onto something as big as land?  I know Shades say he own this land, and that makes some sense, he got us to fight off people who try to do things wit it he don't like (cept for that stupid druid, who I think has been telling bad things to tha cat) but how can you hold onto land so far away from you you dun even know know what going on there?

Then nother odd thing happened taday when we found sum bandits.  I said summin about Shades ownin this land and everyone got all angry, then them bandits said they wanted ta fight us to take the land, like the land was summin we was carryin in our backpacks (it wasn't in Mortma's backpack).  The leader said he'd fight just Mort an if he won he'd take tha land.  I thought "this leader real silly, there's lots of us who can attack him if it looks like Mort going to loose" and I thought we were all trickin him good.  But then Mort did start to loose an only me, Shades an Schnookums  tried ta help.  Others didn't think it was a trick, even Mortma didn't think it was a trick, he just made a promise and was goin to die instead of go back on promise.

And then I realise how tha people here can have so much stuff - they leave their stuff and everyone else promise not ta take it.  Shades keeps land cause we promise to fight for it, and iddits from Aberdeen come for land cause long ago someone promise them they can have it.

If Shades ends up owning lots a land he says he'll make us all part of the people who keep it, after we fighted off them Aberdeen folk with him.  If I'm gonna be part of that I gotta learn how people use promises here.  I guess I kinda understand it.  Back on ma islands I hardly ever hit my husband with my hitting stick or a lighting bolt, but he do what I say when I shout cause shouting is kinda a promise to hit someone if they don't do what you want.  I wonder if he's learned his lesson by now?

Other thing about promises is that people think you gonna keep them, so you can make trick promises you don't keep and that can help you take people's things or fight them better or whateva.  But you have to make enough non-trick promises first so that no one thinks the trick ones are gonna be tricks.  This actually seems kinda simple.

When I was little, when I was first learning how to pull sparks and waves and stuff from tha air, I hoped one day people would call me the Furious Storm cause I was all dangerous and stuff.  But most dangerous storm is storm you don't see commin, where rain and wind come from what was clear sky and you got no time to take shelter or get to high ground.  Maybe I can become a different kind of storm.  Maybe I can use tricks and promises and be not Furious Storm but Secret Storm...

Dungeon Discussion with Tivvy.

So we went to a dungeon! Not one that you'd expect in a castle, exactly, that's called a prison, while a dungeon is more of a complex built into the ground that's full of nasty beasts and strange things. It doesn't really make a lot of sense, but Laniss assures me that it's perfectly normal, and he would know.

Oh, when I said that we 'went' to a dungeon, that was kind of a lie. We're still in the dungeon, so I guess that talking about in past tense doesn't exactly work. Though we did come here in the past, so it kind of works? Maybe?

Anyway! Can you believe that these guys, and the girls too, didn't really have any way of dealing with traps and that sort of nasty surprise other than springing them? I totally couldn't! But I've really helped them out on that front, and I even managed to salvage some of the trap parts for later, which will be massively helpful for everyone, I just know it!

Though right now we're kind of stuck in this weird teleport system. That's what Laniss says anyway, and it makes sense, of course. But while we were zipping around between the rooms in the system thing, we found some people (and a pack mule, of course!) trapped in stone! So we saved them, because you know, adventurers now, right? Most of them were fairly boring (the mule is okay though, I patted him when no one was looking and he seemed alright), but the only woman in the bunch turns out to be a wizard, so that's really good!

Of course, we're still stuck down here until we find a way out, which is why this isn't really detailed or lengthy or anything, but I'm really certain that we'll find a way, because you know, adventurers!

Musings of an Orc 003 - Means to an End

Mother was always a great believer in balance. Since so much wrongness, pain and suffering lead to my being born, she believed I would therefore be destined for great things. I don't think I ever really believed it, but after The Mouth Of Doom it seems she might be right.

It will one day make for an epic tale, but the details are for the bards to make up. Ultimately, we cleansed the dungeon of a pestilence demon, making right a mistake made by well intentioned priests a long time ago.

The demon however, is one thing I feel I must talk about. It was a fascinating beast. Never have I seen such a potent mix of size, strength and intelligence. It shrugged off my blows like it was nothing, and apparently tore Suirlang apart in seconds (may Pharasma judge her kindly). If it weren't for her sacrifice and Aggys bravery, we would have lost the day. I don't often thirst for knowledge, but I think it would be wise to learn more of these things from the lower planes. I doubt it will be the last I see of them and there might be something to learn from it as well.

One thing is clear though. It took all of our might to cleanse that place. Balance was achieved by ruthless application of force, not by half measures. As distasteful as I find it, I understand now why places like Axis exist. Extremes pushing at each other with equal force creates balance. With Rappun Athuk being a place renown for its wickedry, I think I understand the path I need to embrace.

To this end, I have sworn fealty to Shades. Normally, I would say that he is incredibly unsuited to being a Lord. But there is something about him and something about this place that I feel like I can work with.

He governs a wild land and I feel like I can help him tame it. I have visions of armies of guards and soldiers wearing Vanitthus mark on Shades' colours. Wide roads cutting through the forests. High walls surrounding our settlements. Our people will be safe, secure and proud of their Lord. I still need to make an offering to Vanitthu to receive his blessing, but I can make this happen.

Father would be proud.

Triple Team [Agamemnon]

The importance of Siurlang's sacrifice - whether it was intentional or not - in our defeat of A is for Anus should not be underestimated.  However it was only one part of a very well devised and executed strategy, all parts of which had to function for us to have succeeded - and for me to have survived.  It was Shades' insanely ballsy plan to paddle-ball the demon which gave us the breathing space we needed.  Myr was a large part of the reason that only the sorceress was lost on the stairs.

But the bald faced audacity of the dwarf, the orc and I should not be forgotten.  We went into that room with every expectation that we might not come back out again.  Not a fuck was given.

Snooks: I resist poison and disease.
Me: I'm a priest, it's my responsibility.
Mort: Things will need to be hit or this won't work.

Back up plan?  No.  All in.  Not recklessly, but because this was our best and likely only chance to cleanse Mr A from the land.

Not to imply a lack of courage on the other end of the plan - they fully intended to face off against A is for Arsehole itself, after all.  Ballsy fuckers.  Seriously ballsy.

I took more damage that day than I have ever taken before.  That was despite Mortimer keeping the worst of the attacks away from me.  How in the name of the gods those priests thought they would be able to survive the residual damage from their cleansing amulet I do not know.  I took so much scalding steam in the face I feel like a freshly laundered Toldean doublet and look ten years younger for lack of wrinkles, though I have picked up very nasty scarring on my shoulder, arm and chest that not even clerical intervention has been able to entirely remedy.

I want to recount how we actually pulled it off at our end.  Partly for posterity, but mostly because I want it down in writing so that whichever of the three of us survives the longest can tell it by the camp fire to whomever replaces those of us who don't.

The round room had a depression in the centre where an alter stood, obscured beneath a layer of filth that fountained up around it as a shell of obscene protection when we began our assault.  Poison and vermin were everywhere.  Poisonous zombies stood guard, two yellow slimes circled the diseased well, and three-quarters of Applesauce the filth demon hovered in the air, reforming himself.  He attempted a bargain, realising we had a slim chance to take him out and needing time to reach full strength.  We didn't give him any time, intending to make straight for the altar.  But I would have died attempting to reach the well itself, swiped repeatedly en route before getting there.

Enter the ramrods.  An enlarged Mort hurled two of the fuckers backs.  Snooks, as nimble as a dwarf isn't supposed to be, zigzagged through the guards, drawing their attention, and their attacks, opening a path for me to sprint to the altar and throw myself into the pit of vile corruption.

What we didn't plan for was the actual effect of the necklace of hands.  It caused the putrescence to boil off in the form of steam.  Ulman later explained to me that causing water to turn to steam so quickly caused it to be more hot than usual.  It was hot enough to nearly kill me, and combined with the persistent attacks of one zombie which followed me into the hole I very nearly didn't come back out of there.  Thankfully, right there behind me were Snooks and Mort.  Mort reached down and forcibly removed my antagonist from the well, keeping all others at bay while Snooks took hit after hit, channeling healing energy to keep me conscious.

After all the vitriol had boiled away, A-A-Achoo was done.  But alas he was not immediately vanquished.  And he was going to kill us - all three of us, probably, but me definitely, because I was so close to death already, and he seemed especially pissed at me for having the amulet of his undoing.

At that point, thank the gods for Siurlang.  Which gods specifically I'm still not sure, but thank them anyway.

Killing Time with Tivvy.

I always wanted to visit a castle! Mother always told me that I couldn't, because I was needed to help out at home, and going to the castle would be distracting and all. But that's all in the past, obviously! I mean, I wish it was kind of under better circumstances and all, but it's still a castle. Sure, Laniss wasn't very impressed by it, but he's been to school and all. I bet that he's seen plenty of castles.

I should really start at the start, I guess. It's kind of obvious because I'm writing in the empty bit of my sister's last journal, but Siurlang, dear sweet Siurly, well, she died. But that's why I'm here, and I'm sure that she's doing wonderfully in the outer planes, so I'm not too worried about her. I mean sure, death, not great, but you've got to look on the bright side of things!

I keep getting a little distracted, I guess, but there's so much to write about. So, I was at home, in Highcliff, just taking care of things around the village, making sure that the little ones weren't beating each other up too much again, you know, the usual stuff, when we got the letter!

That's the letter from Siurly, of course. The one about how she had this castle and we should visit. Mother didn't like the idea at first, but she eventually warmed to it, and said I could go. Laniss wanted to come too, and it's kind of a good thing he did, because he's pretty handy. They taught him a lot at that school, I guess! Anyway, we packed up our things, and set off. Jamon was a little weird about me going, but that's just how the silly boy is. He'll get over it!

So, we turned up at the castle, to find such a strange bunch of people! Highcliff is pretty much all human, with a few elves like Laniss, so even the orc and his slightly less orc friend were pretty strange to me, let alone the cute little catperson or the bird! Also the dwarves, they're kind of just shorter, thicker humans with beards, I guess. Anyway, it looked like the bird person was in charge of things, so that was also kind of unusual, given what Siurly wrote in her letter. So I immediately know that something was wrong, and yeah, it was. Poor Siurly.

But as I wrote earlier, it's okay! The strange people are some kind of adventuring company, though they seem to thing that involves engineering. Laniss might have rolled his eyes at that, it kind of seems like something he'd find silly, but I was paying attention to everything else at the time. With Siurly dying and all, they needed someone who could use magic, so we're staying around! Sure, I can't use magic or anything, that was what Siurly was good at, but hey, I'm awesome at making myself useful.

First though, we had to see to my dear sister's burial. The adventuring company guys were... well, pretty bad at the whole 'what to do with dead people' thing, which isn't exactly what I would have expected, you know, given that they're adventurers. But that's okay! Laniss and I were happy to help out there, and give Siurly a nice, traditional burial, in a stone coffin under the castle. Laniss did most of the work on the coffin, because he's really good at that, but I helped out with the engraving and carving.

It was a really nice ceremony, too! Everyone who spoke was really nice, and there was even a song about how heroic Siurly was! We held it at sundown, and Laniss and I had a more private ceremony afterwards, which was such a great commemoration of my sister's life.

After that, it was all about fixing up the castle a bit, and just helping out for a bit while everyone else did whatever they needed to do. The other people at the castle, the ones that aren't adventurers, are pretty nice as well, and while very busy with all the things that need to be done around the place, are happy to talk while they do them, especially when I helped them out with their tasks!

I think that this is going to be really good. Mother would be proud, I hope!

In which a small catfolk ranger converses with a giant dog

"So, if you tell me your name I will give you a piece of snerky." Amerasu purred her words in her quiet voice. It was not a weak voice, simply a one unused to talking.

The catfolk put her paw in the pouch containing her snerky rations as her new companion stared back at her. They were sitting in the forest near enough Castle Calaelen to hear the construction work, but far enough away so as not to be able to make out what all the yelling meant.

"Snerky then name." The voice of the large creature sitting next to Amerasu was gruff, his words broken up by barks.

Amerasu handed over a piece of snerky which disappeared rather swiftly. 

"Well? I cannot just keep calling you 'dog', please tell me your name."

"Not dog. Ovcharka. Name be Isgrimnur. More snerky?"

"Not yet! I shall run out if you continue to eat them so rapidly. We are not close enough to the castle to replenish my supplies at present. I would like to know more about you, Isgrimnur. Such as, where are you from and what does 'ovcharka' mean?"

"Isgrimnur from woods. You be catfolk. Isgrimnur be ovcharka. Snerky now?"

Amerasu sighed and handed over another piece.

"For every five questions you answer, you get a piece, understand?"

"What be five?"

Amerasu protracted five claws. 

"That amount."

Isgrimnur cocked his head as he considered this clearly difficult concept. 

"Yes, five then snerky. Less big words, yes?"

"Ok, I'll be more concise from now on. I apologise. I am more used to conversing with elves and they demand a higher standard of conversation."

Isgrimnur glared at Amerasu. She had not realised that a creature with no visible eyebrows could appear to raise them.

"Fine. Why did you follow me?"

"Town smell bad. Amerasu smell good. Snerky smell gooder."

"'I'm very glad I smell better than that town. I prefer to be out of towns. The woods are my home too. I miss them greatly. Especially whenever we are in the Mouth of Doom."

"Doom Mouth where demon smell bad?"

"Yes, that's the place. Unfortunately we've got to spend more time in those foul smelling places. I made a promise to the feathered one to travel with his group. It's not a permanent arrangement. It's part of my training as a clouddancer. Once I prove myself I can go back to my clan.You would of course be welcome to come back with me, though many of the dwellings are in the trees. How do you feel about trees? Do you climb?"

"Tree be good. Ovcharka not climb. Amerasu be odd. Cloud no dance. Snerky?"

"Soon, not yet. Two more questions," Amerasu raised her paw and retracted three claws "A clouddancer doesn't mean a dancing cloud. My clan is called Cloudchaser. It's a difficult concept to explain in Common. I suppose it is my job. I am a clouddancer, I must be swift and exist as part of nature. I must share my talents when they are required. There are times where I wish that I had not signed with this company. But Jirki said I must venture into truly unknown territory, far from any catfolk to properly test my skills. What is more unknown to my kind that such a foul place? It offends the nose, just walking in takes strength, the stench is ghastly. Plus there are spiders. I hate webs. They are so sticky."

"Sticky be bad for fur," Isgrimnur wrinkled his nose at the idea, "What be Jirki? 

"Jirki is my mentor, he's an elf. Our clans have an agreement with each other, they help train our cattens for the jobs they will do when they are of age. I miss him every day. I spent almost every waking moment of my life with him for five years, being apart from him is hard."

"Amerasu talk too much. Want snerky. Then us be run, yes?"

"Yes of course, this must be boring you.  Here, we'll both have a piece and go find Drusilla. I hope you like wolves."

Isgrimnur bounded up in one swift motion and turned his head back to Amerasu.

"We be run now."

She tucked her pouch back into her pocket and followed.